Preschoolers are a special category when it comes to bedtime. They're old enough to stall, negotiate, and devise creative reasons why they absolutely cannot go to sleep yet ("I need water," "the shadow looks scary," "I need to tell you something important"). But they're not old enough to go without the sleep they genuinely need. So what time should a 3 to 5 year old go to bed? The answer: between 7:00 and 8:30 pm, adjusted for your child's schedule. Here's the full picture.
The American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommends 10 to 13 hours of sleep per 24 hours for children aged 3 to 5. This includes any napping, which becomes less common as children move through this age range.
Even when naps stop, preschoolers often still benefit from a daily rest period — quiet time where they're not required to sleep, but the option is there.
For most preschoolers, the ideal bedtime is 7:00 to 8:00 pm on non-nap days, and slightly later (7:30–8:30 pm) on days when a nap was taken.
Here's a quick guide based on wake time:
Research consistently shows that children who go to bed before 9:00 pm sleep better, have better behaviour, and perform better cognitively. This doesn't mean 9:00 pm is a cliff — but it's a useful upper limit to aim to stay within.
If your 4 or 5 year old is starting school or preschool, earlier bedtimes suddenly become more important. Early starts mean early wake times, and if the bedtime hasn't shifted to match, sleep debt builds fast. When a child starts school, it's worth pulling bedtime back by 30 minutes for the first few weeks and watching closely.
The first term of school is exhausting for small children. Later bedtime + early school start = tired, emotional, hard-to-manage child. You'll feel the difference quickly.
Dropping the nap is rarely a clean, overnight change. Most children go through a phase of mixed days — some days they sleep, some days they don't. During this transition, a quiet time of 30–60 minutes in their room is a useful replacement. Give them books, audio stories, or calm toys. No screens.
On days when they don't nap, move bedtime earlier — not later — to compensate. An overtired 3 year old who skipped their nap needs a 7:00 pm bedtime, not an 8:30 pm one.
Preschoolers are expert stallers. The classic moves:
The most effective counter is removing the negotiating surface before it opens:
For a 3–5 year old, a routine of 30–45 minutes works well:
The exact right bedtime for your 3 to 5 year old depends on when they need to wake up. Use the free Kids Sleep Calculator at kidssleepcalculator.com — enter your child's age and wake time and it'll calculate an ideal bedtime based on their sleep needs. Quick and worth checking when schedules shift.
Aim for a bedtime of 7:00–8:00 pm for most 3 to 5 year olds. Move it earlier on no-nap days, slightly later on nap days. A consistent routine takes the argument out of it. And if they're stalling — you're not alone. Every parent of a preschooler has been there.
If a 3 year old has skipped their nap entirely, they're likely running a sleep deficit by evening. Pull bedtime early — 6:30 to 7:00 pm is not too early on a nap-free day. It might feel counterintuitive, but an overtired 3 year old who goes to bed early often sleeps better, not worse.
Some do, some don't. The average age for nap dropping is between 3 and 5 years, with 4 being common. Signs that your 4 year old still needs to nap: they consistently fall asleep in the car mid-afternoon, they have afternoon meltdowns when they don't nap, or they fall asleep during quiet time. If they're happily nap-free and sleeping well overnight, they're ready to drop it.
For most 5 year olds, yes — especially if they have school the next day. Consistently going to bed at 9pm while waking at 6:30–7:00 am for school gives them around 9–10 hours of sleep, which is on the lower end of what they need. Try pulling the bedtime back by 15-minute increments over a week or two to shift it earlier.
Pre-empt the requests before they make them: offer water before the routine, give a snack with dinner, agree on the number of books before you start. Use a visual routine chart so they can track what's happening and what comes next. Keep the final goodbye warm but firm — and once you've said it, stick to it.
This is a very common phase. A few things that help: a visual "pass" they can use once (for one last drink, one last hug) that they know will be honoured — but only once. A glow clock that shows when it's okay to get up. And consistent, calm returns to their room without engaging in conversation or play.
Reviewed by Perry Sutton — Founder, KidsSleepCalculator.com
Last reviewed:
Sources: CDC · American Academy of Pediatrics · NHS